the scariest thing

OMG it has been a while since the last time i wrote my blog... just too much work, or too much procrastination....

I have been wondering what is the most scary thing on earth. When I was small I would definitely say darkness. I still remember I wouldnt go to the bathroom alone without my mum's company at night and I would be frightened by my own shadow. I always had a feeling that something would pop out right behind me.

As I grew up, my perspective changed. I was so afraid to lose. Erm.. it wasnt just about ranking in schools or competitions. I mean... I was afraid to lose face or lose some people's support. But i eventually found out that there's nothing to worry about because you could definitely learn something everytime when you lose. A loss can actually enrich your life in general. So losing is somehow not that scary as you can gain something at the same time.

I just found out what was the most scary thing. I think disillusions and disappointments are the worst things ever. Human beings are born to be optimists but unfortunately lives are meant to be harsh. No matter how much you expect from someone/something, you will just get disillusioned some time later. The first taste of disappointment is insanely bittter but then it becomes tasteless. Not because things get better, but just because you become more desensitized, indifferent and appathetic. Learn not to expect, does it sound too pessimistic? But i guess this is the best way to protect yourself...